Irrepressibility..

Vīrya (Pali: viriya) is a Sanskrit word which can be translated into English as "effort," "vigor*," "diligence," "zeal, and "energy." * Our English word ‘vigor’ actually stems from the same Indo-European root as does the Sanskrit ‘Virya’.


The practice of Virya is a practice in which we exert ourselves to the fullest in whatever task we undertake, giving our all to whatever it is that we are doing, no matter how seemingly mundane or relatively unimportant it may seem. The teachings of the 'Historical' (Shakyamuni) Buddha admonishes us not to approach whatever we do halfheartedly, but, rather, to put everything we have into it. Approach each and every undertaking with a full heart, dig down deep, and put your guts into it!!

From the Indo-European Rootword “w -ro-“, we derive not only the Sanskrit ‘Virya’ but also the following Englisha nd Latin words; ‘virago’, ‘virile’, ‘virtue’, ‘virtuosa’, and ‘virtuoso’.



In Buddhism, we use the term Vīrya in a number of instances, which may cause some confusion to new practitioners, or to those who have only a passing interest in Buddhism or Buddhist thought.

Vīrya is:

• One of the five controlling faculties (indriya).


• One of the five powers (bala).


• One of the six (or ten) paramitas.


• One of the seven factors of enlightenment (bodhyaṅga), and;


• Is identical with right effort of the Noble Eightfold Path (Pali: aṭṭhaṅgiko maggo; Skt.: aṣṭāṅga mārga).


• It stands for strenuous and sustained effort to overcome unskillful ways (akusala dhamma), such as indulging in unmoderated sensuality, ill will and harmfulness (see, e.g., ahimsa, nekkhamma).


• It stands for the right endeavour to attain dhyāna.


• Vīrya does not stand for physical strength.


• It signifies strength of character and the persistent effort for the well-being of others. In the absence of sustained efforts in practicing meditation, craving creeps in and the meditator comes under its influence. Right effort known as vīryabala is, thus, required to overcome unskillful mental factors and deviation from dhyāna.

* Zen is a ‘School’ or ‘Tradition’ of Buddhism, there are various schools or traditions which have their own focus and perhaps slightly different methods. Zen is 'a' way. There are many paths to the top of the mountain.


There are, more or less, three phases of Zen Training; Virya paramita: energy, effort, exertion, is called in Japanese ‘Shojin’. Thus then, the Fourth Paramita is actually the First Phase of the Three Phases of Zen, which are;

---THE THREE PHASES OF ZEN:

There are three phases or stages of training typically found common to Zen:

I The First Phase is shojin, the period of training in which the will and conscious effort are involved, and may take three to five years of diligent practice. II The Second Phase is the period of concentration without conscious effort. The disciple is at peace. He can become an assistant to the master and later become a master himself and teach others in his turn. III The Third Phase the spirit achieves true freedom, Enlightenment. Over and over it is found Zen historians citing the experience of full liberation being brought about by (but not limited to) hsing-chiao (also Un-Sui – lit. ‘Clouds & Water’ ((also a term for a monk)) ) whichch consists of sending the learner traveling from one hill to another, from one school to another, studying under one master and then another.

The Japanese word for the First Phase, Shojin, translates as "ceaseless effort" or "constant effort." Said to be from the Sanskrit word "Virya" (in Pali: Viriya).

There are many cases where Buddhist monks have accomplished amazing things simply by applying this attribute of ceaseless effort to their lives and to their practice.


Dharma Master Cheng Yen Fa-Shi, is one such Buddhist nun. In 1966, she founded the Tzu Chi Foundation after she witnessed the devastating poverty experienced by many Taiwanese people. She persuaded 30 housewives to form a group and to save 50 cents a day from their housekeeping money. This money was then used to help the poor. In one year, these 30 housewives helped 15 families. The foundation grew from there to its present size of more than 5 million supporters and 30,000 trained volunteers.

The organization also includes a Buddhist order of nuns, who further the work of the foundation. One thing I find fascinating about this order is that, unlike most other forms of Buddhism, they don't take any money from anyone for their own support.


Buddhist monks from Thailand's Sisaket province wanted a temple but had no money or much in the way of resources with which to obtain building supplies. Rather than lament what they were lacking, they took matters into their own hands and collected a million bottles to build the Wat Pa Maha Chedi Kaew temple.


Dying practice teaches us that time is passing, life is fleeting, and that living authentically and completely can only be achieved by being entirely present in the present moment. This means giving each and every moment everything that we have got to give, and holding nothing back at all. What might *you* do if you apply Virya Paramita to your daily life and practice?

Meditations Upon Cleaning the Cat-Litter Box

There is much wisdom to be gained from the simple, mundane, and often forgotten tasks that life requires of us. Today, as I washed the dishes, cleaned out the cat litter box, and emptied the garbage, I rejoiced in the 'such-ness' of my work!!

As I washed the dishes, I relished the feel of the clean, hot water, the scent of the soap, and the squeaking sound of newly cleaned dishes. Rather than absent myself from my task, I remained silently mindful and appreciative of this moment as being as much a part of my life as any other moment... and this helped me to remain 'present' as I worked.


Washing dishes is a supremely optimistic activity, if one thinks about it at all; If we had no expectation of yet another meal to come, why wash the dishes at all? Truthfully, the act of washing dishes is cause for much appreciation - in order to have dishes at all, we must have had the means of acquiring them... in order to wash them and to have them, we must have some place in which to both store them and wash them.. a kitchen perhaps!! To have a kitchen is to have a place to prepare meals, maybe a place where one can live, and rest... or sleep. The fact that I could do dishes rather than remain wary and be constantly on guard is due, primarily, to my sense of security. I must feel safe from harm to be able to focus on dishes... rather than on my personal safety.

If I consider one dish, I have reason to be grateful to a vast number of people whose efforts were brought to bear in the design, manufacture, transport and sale of this single item. Someone had to conceive of its design, and sit down to draw the design out. That person needed a table, pens and pencils, rulers, and other tools, inks, erasers, a chair, clothing.. and an office.. in a building! Each of these items, in turn must also be designed and manufactured!

Once a dish is designed, it must be made. Clay must be obtained, and tools are needed to excavate the clay... perhaps an area must first be cleared of trees... a road constructed for access... vessels in which to store and move the clay... and machines or devices to process it. Molds are needed, as well as racks, a kiln, paints, glazes, packaging, vehicles, and all of these things in turn require the work of many... for each step of the way some item is required ... and each item is brought into being only as a collective process... the trees are felled with tools... someone must survey the area to be cleared... the direction that the road will take... and so on. Accountants, administrators and managers must ply their trade... drivers, receiving clerks, packagers, salespeople, cashiers.... all work so that a dish will come into being, and I will be able to use it! I must have some means by which I can earn money in order to purchase my dish... and clothing to wear in order to shop... and someplace to bring the dish once I have acquired it. This one small item involves the work and cooperation of literally thousands,... if not millions of people.

And it is only one dish.

How wonderful to realize how my life is intertwined so inextricably with the lives of so many others! Many of whom I shall never meet, or see!! And yet... I have a dish from which to eat food that nourishes my body, and the bodies of my loved ones... so that we may continue to live, love, be healthy, and stay happy!!

How grateful I am to be able to do the dishes!!

Cleaning the cat litter box seems very unpleasant... it smells foul, it is dirty, and I must be in an uncomfortable position as I work... and yet, in order to have a cat litter box to clean, I must first have at least one cat. In fact, I have two. Two beautiful, perfect, silken wonders... two generous non-judgmental spirits who love me unconditionally. It makes no difference to them that I be rich, famous, honorable, or truthful... only that I be kind. What matters to them is that I am me. And we are of the same tribe. They never speak.. but, when I move from one part of the house to another, they silently get up and follow, in order to be near me. They ask nothing of me. They give whatever is in their heart to give. Each and every day. In order for them to use the cat litter box, they must be fed.. and in order for me to feed them, I must be at least wealthy enough to be able to afford to purchase food for them. It occurs to me that I am very lucky indeed to be fortunate enough to clean the cat litter box. There are many people in this world who have not a single friend as loving or as loyal as my cats are to me.

Taking out the garbage seems to be a nuisance at first glance... however, when I realize that what I throw away... no matter how thrifty my habits may be, is often more than many people ever own in all of their lifetime. I take the garbage out to the trash can, and it is picked up by men who are paid to do this.... and carted to the landfill or dump... this process involves the work of many... and indicates to me that I am enfolded in the protective arms of a society that is wealthy and organized enough to have such luxuries as a garbage disposal system. The plastic garbage can that I line with plastic garbage bags... and the bags themselves are beyond the means of many, many people in the world. Some of whom would feast on the bits that I consider garbage.


Washing dishes, cleaning cat litter box, taking out garbage... these are as much a part of my life as my greatest triumph... and pray that I will always have the presence of mind and the wisdom to appreciate the many, many gifts that these seemingly unimportant tasks reveal to me.

These tasks which are mine to perform are a gift to me from the whole universe.

Each item that I own represents a sacrifice of time, effort, and perhaps a sacrifice of life by some being... may I be always worthy to receive that.

May the wisdom that I gain through the performance of my work give me, each day, the strength to transform my unwholesome qualities into wholesome ones...

May I be ever grateful of the marvelous blessings, however small, that are bestowed upon me each moment that I live...

Kshanti Paramita

The Third Paramita is called Kshantí Paramita (Sanskrit) (Khanti in Pali) which variously translates as patience, forbearance, forgiveness, tolerance, endurance, acceptance, etc.

When we practice exercising patience or tolerance towards situations, circumstances or behavior which may not necessarily deserve it, we are practicing Kshanti. The practice of Kshanti should be seen as a conscious choice to actively and wholeheartedly give our patience and acceptance – as a gift – rather than to do so out of some feeling of social or personal obligation. Kshanti stems from feelings of compassion and love rather than oppression, and we therefore practice Kshanti as a voluntary action, and not because we have been forced or manipulated into acting in such a way.


To exercise patience in the sense that is implied by the practice of Kshanti doesn’t mean to simply ‘put up’ with something... it means having some balance, a sense of restraint. Often, when confronted with unpleasant or difficult situations or people, we react rather instinctively (and often negatively!) rather than respond appropriately. To exercise Kshanti is to open our heart to the world.. to life.. to others... being patient instead of being totally irritable and reactive. It means persevering through whatever twists and turns the path requires. Life most often does not unfold according to our pre-planned expectations. Often, our expectations are not even realistic, and yet, when we fail to realize them, we become frustrated, irritable, and unhappy. This unhappiness brings unhappiness to us, and to those around us. Practicing Kshanti, we freely accept that we will face obstacles, difficulties, failures, problems.. this is life.. and this is what it is to be a human being. What truly matters is what actually happens, however, since this is, in fact, our life and our story. So; although we naturally hope to achieve all of our goals and to meet with success in every venture that we undertake, it is a wise person who realizes and accepts that often life simply does not go according to plan, so, we must be patient not only with others and with circumstances, but, more importantly, with ourselves. To truly practice Kshanti is to start by having patience and tolerance with our inability to meet our own expectations, to accept our weaknesses, faults, hang-ups, and neuroses – to love ourselves, and to accept ourselves, just as we are. Once we can practice Kshanti towards our self, we can open our heart to others, and to the world, the universe, the cosmos. Accepting oneself in this way, totally and completely, gives us access to the vast open spaces of our own heart; space in which we may live and grow.


Whatever happens as our life unfolds is our story, so, why not simply accept this gift of life, whatever it happens to be?? In actuality, regardless of what we may hope for or expect, the truth is that we are all here for the whole show, so we should exercise Kshanti Paramita, and willingly see it through, wherever it ultimately takes us. It is our story. It is our life!! To avoid it or to miss it is not only a shame, and a waste; it is a crime!.


The simple (or not so simple!) fact is this: What life offers us is what we have to work with, period!

We are not going anywhere else; this is it! Very often, wisdom comes to people as they get older and this realization sets in. They realize that no matter what they do, they are going to keep on keeping on. That's the most secret, mystical meaning of the Kshanti Paramita.


People have often pointed out at this point that there are many who have decided to commit suicide.. and they ask me, “What about so and so who committed suicide?” Well, each of us is struggling with something, and, often our suffering and pain drives us to act in ways that are not in keeping with our true nature, or with our innate wisdom. Even then there is a type of flow, continuity or ‘on-going-ness’. We are all in it for the whole journey. Don't be deceived by mere appearances. Throughout nature, no matter where you look, death always results in new life and new beginnings, and I suspect that the ‘big picture’ is too big for me to understand. So, I am left with the decision, with each breath, to practice Kshanti Paramita... or not. We are always dying.. in every moment... we carry the seed of our own destruction within us... or, more accurately, the seed of our own destruction *IS* us... and not a separate thing or quality. We are also being born in every moment... always arriving... and never reaching our destination. Life is a process... and it is constantly flowing, and evolving, and happening. Life does not wait. Life simply is. We cant fold it up and put it neatly into a labeled pigeon-hole. We must exercise Kshanti.. be patient, accept what life unfolds in the eternal and ever-changing moment.


Whatever life confronts us with.. whatever we may be forced to engage, we will do it more skillfully and more artfully with a calm, clear, serene and tranquil mind. No matter *what* comes to us... if we have the presence of mind to call our wisdom and experience to bear, even if we have few options other than to endure what comes... we will do it better if we respond with forethought, wisdom, and an open, accepting, tolerant, loving, and patient mind than if we simply react out of irritability, fear, frustration, and anger.


Have patience!

"May I be be pure and virtuous."

Sila Paramita, the perfection of ethics and morality represents the Bodhisattva's abstention from the commission of evil deeds involving his body, speech or mind.

The abstinences of the body consist of abstaining from killing living self-aware beings, taking that which is not freely given, or indulging excessively in sensual pleasures, sexual misconduct or ingesting substances which cloud the mind or cause confusion.


The abstinences of speech include abstaining from falsehood, slander, and finding fault in others.

The abstinences of mind consist of refraining from thoughts of jealousy, envy, wrath, hatred or greed.

These abstinences are sometimes referred to as precepts (though both my teacher and my Roshi tend to dislike this translation, simply preferring to use the term 'Síla' instead.)

These Síla or precepts offer us a moral and ethical guideline. For the most part, those of us who were raised, particularly in a Western Judeo-Christian society, are more or less used to morality being defined by rules, and most of those rules are preceeded by the word "don't".


In Buddhism, the 'rules' are mostly guidelines which help us to ameliorate or to lessen the effects of the Three Poisons (anger, greed and delusion) by warning us to avoid the acts that result from those poisons.

We are not expected to blindly follow a set of rules that have been written down without first comparing them against our own wisdom, and against our own life experience.

Naturally, there are often times when our wisdom may not be so great, or our life experience painfully wanting in certain areas, and, it is in this case that we look to our mentors, our teachers, or others who fill this role in our lives, to help us to gain some better understanding of how to apply these precepts to whatever we may be confronting.

The Six Paramitas give us a different perspective on ethics, and our teachers help us to apply them to our own lives and circumstances. The close relationship between student and teacher in Zen is extremely important for this reason, and for many other reasons as well. For those who are not Zen practitioners, there are others who may very well fill this place in your life; parent, teacher, priest, rabbi, friend, whoever we look up to, whoever we wish to emulate, whoever is a positive example for us to follow. As in many things, it is very important that we choose carefully who we allow to fill this role for us.

In a previous post, I mentioned that the word 'Paramita' (Parami in the origninal Pali) actually means, "To cross to the other shore." So, the paramitas are also the ways by which we cross away from the Three Poisons (anger, greed and delusion) to live a better life.

Síla means virtue, ethics, morality, self-discipline, impeccability. Síla is a beautiful Sanskrit and Pali word. It means that which cools the intense broiling, roiling stew of passions and conflicting emotions. It's like a shade tree in the desert of blazing, conflicting emotions, a shelter where we can find relief. Non-attachment, integrity, and a righteous, honest, impeccable life provides a shelter, a true refuge in our increasingly confusing times.


On an external basis, Síla is somewhat akin to 'Ahimsa' or 'not harming'.

On an internal basis, this means exercising integrity and honesty.

Every human being has this innate capacity to be honest and pure of heart, even if it is only dimly viewed at times, and not revealed so very often. We each have the capacity to be impeccable, honest, virtuous. Not self-righteous, but to live what is known as the righteous life. That's enlightened living.

We can approach our training and our practice from the outside in, by restraining or vowing not to harm, not to engage in improper behavior, not to kill, lie, steal, intoxicate ourselves, and so on.

We can also simultaneously approach our trainng and our practice from the inside out, from our innate goodness and integrity, by resting in the natural state without clinging, free from concepts and attachment.

By utilizing this approach of working both from the outside in, as well as the inside out, we allow our natural morality, natural integrity, and natural impeccability to flow forth without vows, without having outer strictures. We allow our true nature to shine forth, and, we improve our own life, and the lives of others around us.

So, it is best to train is from outside in and inside out at the same time, not just blindly following rules, but allowing our true nature to flower and our highest character to develop. This is enlightened living. When we allow ourselves to change for the better, our children and grandchildren and the world change, too.

Morality and ethics is, at its most basic form, about expressing a love for others. A sense of kindness, tolerance, and compassion for every other being. It is better, from a Zen standpoint to exploit that innate, natural resource of love and compassion, and to let it guide our actions towards other, rather than exploiting others for what we think we need and want. Let's exploit our own natural resource within, our own true spiritual inheritance. That is something we can never really lose; no one and nothing can take it away from us. It can only be given away, bartered or sold... but never taken.

The essential nature of this paramita is that through our loving-kindness and compassion we refrain from harming others; we are virtuous and non-harming in our thoughts, speech, and actions. This practice of ethical conduct is the very foundation for progressing in any practice of meditation or spiritual growth and for attaining all higher realizations on the path to enlightenment.

The practice of Dána (generosity) must always be supported by the practice of Síla (ethics); as this ensures the lasting results of our generosity.

We should constantly strive to perfect our conduct by eliminating harmful behavior and following the precepts of the Six Paramitas.

The Paramitas are not meant to be a burden or a restriction of our freedom. We follow these precepts so we can enjoy greater freedom, happiness, and security in our lives, because through our virtuous behavior we are no longer creating suffering for ourselves and others.

It is important to realize that unethical behavior is always involved somewhere in the cause of suffering and unhappiness. If we consider, even to the slightest degree, the advantages of cultivating ethical behavior and the disadvantages of cultivating unethical behavior, we will certainly view the practice of ethics with a greater sense of enthusiasm.

In practicing the perfection of ethics, we become free of negativity, we cause no harm to others by our actions, our speech is kind and compassionate, and our thoughts are free of anger, malice, and other delusional or otherwise wrong views.

Those whose commitment is strong in the practice of ethics are at ease, naturally confident, without stress, and happy because we are not carrying any underlying sense of guilt or remorse for our actions, and thus, we have nothing to hide from anyone! Maintaining our personal honor and integrity, our moral impeccability, this is the cause of all goodness, happiness, and even the attainment of enlightenment.

Nobody is perfect. Each of us has likely committed some act in our lives for which we are ashamed or regretful. There is little or nothing that can be done to change what has happened in the past. We can attempt to make amends for whatever we may have done, if this is possible, or, we can accept that it was an unskillful act, realize that it was caused by a series of wrong views and wrong choices, and resolve to begin developing right views, and making right choices based upon them. It is through the practice of Síla Paramita that we are able to develop these right views.


Not a one of us is a snapshot. Nothing that we do, either good or bad is indicative of our nature, or of who or what we are. It is simply something which took place. We are a process... continuously flowing and changing, and each breath provides us with a brand new opportunity to begin anew!

Two Out of Three

In Buddhist practice we teach about the 'Six Paramitas', which are often translated as the 'Six Perfections' or 'Transcendences' or something similar. These are all suitable translations, however, the Sanskrit word Paramita (Parami in the origninal Pali) actually means, "To cross to the other shore."

What does this mean? Clearly it is a metaphoric statement, and what it is making reference to, at least to my understanding, is the process by which we cross over the sea of suffering (Samsara) to reach the far shore of happiness & awakening (Nirvana). This is also, in turn, metahphoric, and is used to explain how we transform ourselves, through the tenets of Buddhist thought and practice, moving or 'crossing over' from ignorance & delusion to enlightenment.

This process of self transformation is not an easy one, and there are volumes upon volumes of Buddhist writings, scripture, and doctrine which describe methods by which this may be achieved.

Dying practice is, in a sense, a concentrated form of Buddhist practice in which one is primarily practicing the Six Paramitas. Perhaps it would be best for me to simply list them, and discuss the first of the six in this post, and the others in subsequent posts.

The Six Paramitas:

1. Dána Paramita (The Perfection of Generosity): Dána means to give, or, generosity. The English words donor, donote, and donation are derived from the word 'Dána'. Dána means the practice of compassion; it is charity, offering, and generosity. The essence of this paramita is unconditional love, for all beings. It is the practice of giving freely, without attachment or expectation. This can be giving in the monetary sense, or giving of our time, our love, and ourselves - giving of our presence. Regardless of what is given, or why it is given, the very act of giving must, by definition, involve the act of 'letting go' by one of the parties involved. Being able to let go is paramount in the practice of Dána Paramita, and is also a critical factor in the ability to successfully live one's life fully, properly, without reservation or equivocation and authentically. In Buddhism, Dána is broken down into three major types of giving;
   
   
   1. The giving of wealth, material resources. This is the giving of what one has to give for the purpose of giving, and not for the purpose of receiving some recognition or any other benefit. In order to be able to give selflessly, we must first find a method by which the human sense of self, the idea of a separate, distince entity or body/mind complex can be reduced to zero; By allowing the 'Ego self' to dissolve away, one finds that all of the thoughts, hopes, and desires cease at last - and we find ourselves surprised by the utter cessation of these desires. (coincidentally, the Sanskrit word 'Nirvana' {'Nibbana' in Pali} means 'extinguish' or 'blow out' and is not the name of some type of paradise or heaven, as many people (particularly in the west) seem to envision). A step towards this achieving this reduction of the sense of self is the practice of Dána Paramita; due to the fact that, in order to be able to be truly generous, one must be able to diminish one's sense of not only a self, but a sense of ownership or possession. Doing this, i.e., removing 'me' also goes a long way towards removing 'mine;, 'my', 'ours' etc. a common tendency to stockpile resources to one's own benefit, and to the benefit of one's family, whereas Buddhism, Zen training, Dying Practice, and similar types of mental training strive to de-emphasize this inborn focus upon the self - upon the 'me', 'my' and 'mine' in favor of a more inclusive view of the world and of the cosmos. The practice of facing, considering, contemplating and, if successful, ultimately accepting the imminence of one's death/dying, must, by force, lead one to consider that there is a greater self, or greater nature, which exists beneath the overly of the 'Ego self' (the 'I' or 'Me' what we commonly envision as living somewhere 'behind my eyes' and looking out on the world, making choices, passing judgments, and having opinions, preferences, and other types of notional thinking and afflictive emotions.
   
   
   2. The giving of Teaching. As monks, we tend to spend a fair amount of our time teaching the Dharma (Dhamma in Pali) (The word dharma literally translates as that which upholds or supports, and is generally translated into English as law. The word "dharma" can also be translated as "the teachings of the Buddha") to others. Indeed, we are obligated to teach the Dharma when requested to do so. One does not have to be a monk, however, to practice this type of Dána Paramita (Teaching others). When we take the time to teach others, we go a long way towards helping them to learn how to be more self-reliant. To stand, in essence, upon their own two feet. The giving or donating of material resources helps us to solve immediate needs. If we wish to find solutions to more long-range problems, however, we must teach. One doesn't have to have exceptional skills as a teacher. If we simply focus on teaching whatever we are knowledgeable or skilled at and what others are not, we can be highly successful. To a monk, however, the highest form of teaching is the teaching of the Dharma, which can help people find lasting happiness and liberation.
   
   
   3. The giving of Fearlessness. I began discussing this form of giving in a previous journal entry; Please see my previous post on this topic for an in-depth discussion on this form of giving. In this post I conclude the discussion of Dána Paramita (giving) by offering a teaching not only on the giving of resources, but on the giving of teaching itself. I hope you will forgive my not repeating or adding to my entry on the giving of fearlessnes... after all, two out of three is not so bad!!
   
   
   So. In this post and in my previous post, I have discussed the first of the Six Paramitas (Dána Paramita - The Perfection of Giving. This is appropriate for Dying Practice, for, when one dies, the act of dying is the supreme act of giving... for one gives the very essence of oneself... every last thing that we possess. Perhaps, then, if we practice Dána Paramita starting today, we will not only improve the lives of others by way of our generosity, but, also improve and transform our own.. indeed, we may find that we have been transformed. When it is time to die for us, we will be so practiced in the perfection of giving that it will simply come to us in our natural stride, with ease, with dignity, and with beauty. I have discussed a portion the first of the Six Paramitas in the previous post, and in this one - albeit slightly out of order, discussed the remainder. I intend to discuss the remaining five Paramitas in upcoming posts. These remaining five Paramitas are:
   
   
2. Síla Paramita (The Perfection of Ethics):



3. Kshantí Paramita (The Perfection of Patience):



4. Virya Paramita (The Perfection of Joyous Effort/Enthusiastic Perserverance):



5. Dhyana Paramita (The Perfection of Concentration):



6. Prajna Paramita (The Perfection of Wisdom):

I have not decided whether I will cover each in a separate post, break each one down and cover it over a series of posts, or cover all of the remaining in one single post.. but, I will do my best to present it in the best way that I am able.

In any case, for those of you who either enjoy what is written here, or find it helpful to your practice, or in your daily life, perhaps you will visit again to learn a bit more about these perfections.

With palms joined....

Fearlessness

Fear is something that we are all intimately familiar with.. everyone has, from time to time, confronted some situation or circumstance that has turned their insides to ice water, and their knees to rubber.

There are many different types and gradiations of fear, probably as many as there are individuals to experience them.

Fear can be debilitating. It can cause us to close the fist of our heart, close our minds, close our ears... withdraw...

It can result in a life that is not lived honestly, fully, and completely.

As human beings, we must experience fear... it is part of what it is to be human. We cannot escape this... and we cannot avoid it.

This journal, in its entirety, is, more or less an investigation into human fear. A very basic fear that we each share: fear of dying. I do not say fear of death, because once we are dead, I would imagine that there is no longer anything to fear. But, the actual process of dying is a different matter entirely!! Will there be pain? Will there be indignity? Suffering? These are things that we all face, sooner or later, and must therefore consider.

Fear can take many forms.. however, in its basic essence, it is fear of dying that is our greatest fear. Naturally, I am generalizing.. but, I don't think that I am so very far from the truth in making this statement.

Does this mean that we are all cowards? Because we have a fear of dying?

Well... I would have to say that cowardice is a refusal to acknowledge fear. How so?

Courageousness and bravery are not products of the reduction of fear, but of transcending fear... of going beyond fear... of acting according to our values despite the presence of fear!


Do you think that Jesus Christ did not feel fear during his long night in the garden of Gethsemane?

Do you suppose that Mohammed was not in fear when he entered the cave called Hira and was confronted by the Angel Gabriel and commanded to read? (recite).

Fear is something that can steal our resolve, or cause us to shut down ... the meaning of 'petrified' means to be turned to stone, and the true meaning of horror is to be rendered incapable of communicating with others... as when buried alive, or locked in to some place with some form of terrible person or creature or other fearsome thing and not able to get the attention of others, i.e, help.

The underlying purpose of both Zen practice, in general, and Dying practice, specifically, is to foster fearlessness in the practitioner.

To be fearless is to be free. To experience fearlessness, to make it an integral part of one's nature is to be at home wherever one happens to be.

What better way to begin to understand the nature of fear than to confront and examine one's own mortality, as well as one's responses and reactions to that mortality?

There are many situations that can trigger fear, not just the thought of dying... new or changing circumstances or people, pressure, attachment to loved ones (i.e., fear of losing them), attachment to belongings, attachment to status.. these are just a few.

I often see people begin to confront fears and anxieties when they first come to learn how to practice Zen; they very likely have never attempted to constrain themselves either physically or mentally in a similar fashion... or, if they have, there was no social pressure as there is an Zendo to 'stick to it'. There is no escape! (In the strictest sense, this is always true - for you cannot escape from yourself ((if you have one! HA!)) ). Sometimes they confront these discomforting feelings and learn to engage them and not to try to control them.. to 'let go' in essence of the illusion of having control over everything in one's life.. and we see them again. More often, they do not... and we don't see them again, or, perhaps not for a while. It isn't an easy thing to do. To sit quietly, in stillness, and in silence is a tall order for someone who has spent most of their life doing just the opposite... it can be like sitting upon an ant hill! The pain comes in waves.. physical, mental, and emotional.

I watch them as they begin to feel the physical discomfort set in.... and they struggle with that.... and then the anxieties and fears begin to gnaw at them; How long will this last? (we tell them at the outset... but time doesn't pass the same way when you are on 'the cushion'.) My leg is going numb! Will it fall off?! I shouldn't be sitting here doing nothing!! I should be [insert 'productive' activity here]. While I am here.. what is my husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/TV/cat/child doing?? I have been sitting here for nearly 20 minutes!! When am I going to get enlightened?!?!

For some, there are some very deep-set anxieties... perhaps the loss of a loved one that they have never yet found closure for... some 'failure' or what they view as a failure that crops up to fill the silence... lost loves... lost wealth... loss... failure... BOREDOM.

In our modern culture, boredom is to be avoided at any cost!!

I think that on some level.. this is a coward's attitude. When boredom sets in, anxiousness begins to rear its head. We are beginning to get closer to our fear. It is time to find some form of entertainment, and to banish any thoughts of death or of loss!

The truth is somewhat simple; you cannot control everything that happens to you, or around you. You DO NOT control most of what happens... more likely, you do not actually control anything other than yourself.. and perhaps that not so well without working very hard at it. So, why go through the trouble? Why not just live life with one's head in the sand and be content with that? Well.. most folks don't really ask these questions, and so there is no answer if a question has not been posed. For those of us who do ask... it is up to us to seek out the truth... or at least a truth that will suffice for now.. until we learn more.

There are many ways to avoid thoughts of death and loss... and most are probably not overly healthy on some level. No matter how much we avoid thinking of it... it is still a part of us. Not behind us... or out there... not in us ... simply 'us'. We *are* our own death... we *are* our own sadness and loss. It is not something that we can be separate from.

Fear has to be acknowledged. We have to realize that we fear, that we feel fear... and we must reconcile ourselves with that fear. We grow up thinking that it is somehow wrong to feel fear or to be sad or to be vulnerable to fear or to sadness. That is hogwash. We fear. So what? It is part of being what we are; human.

I think it is an act of cowardice to avoid acknowledging fear. I think it is an act of cowardice to live a life as though we have no fear, and nothing to fear. As though we will never die.

In times past, death was part of daily life. When a family member died, they were cleaned and prepared for their funerary rites by the family. (this is where we get the term 'parlor' for living room from... the dead were laid out in the parlor. This is probably why we call it a funeral 'home'.


Nowadays, death is hidden from view and it is taboo to discuss it openly. Nobody says that so and so 'died'... we avoid the point by using all sorts of euphemisms. But, this changes nothing. ... and it never has. The only thing that changes is our method of dealing with and of apprehending reality and truth.

I think it is better to acknowledge fear. To face it... to observe our behavior when in the grip of fear... even tiny fears. I have noticed how fear often manifests itself as a form of restlessness.

Acknowledging fear isn't a cause for us to be ashamed (another form of fear), dismayed or depressed. Only by feeling fear and by acknowledging fear can we ever hope to claim our legacy of being fearless. Fearlessness is not by any means the absence or the reduction of fear.. it is simply the ability to move beyond that fear.


Fearlessness begins when we stop... when we cease... when we are still.... and when we begin to examine our fear. To observe it, and to notice how it affects us mentally, emotionally, and physically. It is important to study and learn how we respond to embarrassment, shyness, loneliness, anger (another form of fear), prejudice, bigotry, (both forms of fear), anxiety, nervousness, concern... we will notice that these emotions are always 'moving' and creating energy in our bodies... making us feel restlessness and vamping up our breathing, our heart rate, and our blood pressure. However, when we stop... when we deliberately observe and control our breathing... when we examine these feelings that cause restlessness all the way to thier root cause; what we find is sadness, which is calm and soft.


When we find our sadness, there is a tight feeling in the chest... and in the throat... rather than in the abdomen, where fear is held. This feeling culminates in the production of tears from our eyes.... and we release the sadness.... like a gentle rain in spring... or perhaps like a fierce winter gale... but, we are able to find release nonetheless.

Only by working with and discovering the softness and the openness of the human heart can we hope to find the beginning of fearlessness. There is nothing so strong or so powerful as gentleness.

This may seem awkward at first for some... that is okay... awkwardness is fear in another guise... but, eventually it becomes very apparent at how appropriate and proper it is for a human being to be tender, open and compassionate. And, perhaps, a little bit sad. Sadness is soft, and pliable... it gives, and it bends. Bravery by itself is brittle and hard - and easily broken.

When we are tender and open, we learn to become fearless... when we are gentle and compassionate, we accept the fear in others... and we learn to communicate honestly and directly... both with ourselves, and with others.


In Buddhism, this compassionate nature is embodied by the Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara (Sanskrit: Literally "Lord who looks down and hears the cries of the world". ). Avalokiteshvara is known as Kannon in Japan, Kwan-Yin (Gwan-Yin) in China, Kwan-Sae-Eum Bo-SSal in Korea, Chenrezig in Tibet, and in Mongolia; Megjid Janraisig. The Dalai Lama is believed by Tibetan Buddhists to be an incarnation of Chenrezig. Clearly, the embodiment of compassion, tenderness, kindness, gentleness and love is a very important concept to Buddhists.


Clearly, it is a very important concept to all beings.

Whether you are practicing Zen, conducting your own dying practice, or following some other spiritual practice... whether you are not following some spiritual practice... regardless of who or what you are... I would like you to discover your fearlessness.


Fearlessness is the most profound gift that can be bestowed upon one. It is said that power corrupts... but I disagree. I would submit to you that it is fear that corrupts. Fear of losing power. Fear of what those in power may do. Fear corrupts the mind. Fear corrupts the heart.


Fear builds walls. Fearlessness builds bridges.

Sit still. Stand tall. Be fearless.

Learning How to Die is Learning How to Live

As of this writing, I have approximately four and a half month left to live. Much of my practice has been devoted to my life review, in which I am primarily focused upon the past.. sorting things out and bringing them to mind so that I may meditate upon them with gratitude, forgiveness, and so that I might treat each encounter with those who have shared my life's journey for some period of time with finality. In each case, I say goodbye to them with the understanding that this is very likely the last time we will ever meet in this life.



More than anything else, this practice of 'parting as though it is our last meeting' has had a profound effect on me, on my way of thinking and approaching my life, and, truthfully, on what and who I am.

There are experiences and practices that alter our understanding, perhaps by increasing or refining knowledge.

There are experiences and practices that alter our emotions, perhaps by enabling us to either release them or to control them... according to our particular need.

There are experiences and practices that alter our behaviors, perhaps by offering some type of ethical guidelines, a moral compass, or some other 'benefit' ( I am thinking now of the military, perhaps incarceration, or a monastic vocation -- each of these are likely an amalgam of the aforementioned experiences, however... they are different somehow.)



Lastly, there are experiences and practices that change a person on a fundamental level. (Now that I sit here and let my thoughts go where they will for a few moments... the three examples in the previous paragraph/parentheses actually qualify to live in this paragraph, but, I am going to leave them just where they are... ) In any case, the practice of treating each experience with finality is just such a practice. At least for me. Treating each meeting with another person, each meal, each day, each breath ... as though it is the very last time it will be experienced, adds a vibrancy, a poignancy, and a degree of gratitude and appreciation that makes behaving otherwise seem colorless and devoid of meaning.

If I take nothing else from this practice, I will take this.

As it turns out, I will take much more from my Dying Practice... as a matter of fact, I have been slowly incorporating a great deal into my way of living. In many cases this was deliberate, and in a great many more cases I hadn't realized I was doing so until I re-read my journal, or otherwise found reason to review 'pre-dying practice' time period and compared it to the present time period. Not in one case have I found this to be unwise, unpleasant, or unwelcome.

Life review practice is beginning to enter the time period where my monastic practice began to flag, everything was in doubt, and I started making less than wise choices. In a few cases, where I made some of the worst judgment calls and biggest mistakes of my life. Happily, there was enough of 'me' left in those days that I was able to curtail my journey down that particular path of unskillful behavior, unskillful thought, and harmful effects. For me, this way is better. Maybe better for those around me, too. You know, people have said things to me on more than one occasion along the lines of 'well, you monks are sacred, you are different from the rest of us... its easier for you! You never do anything wrong...', etc. Well, that is very far from the truth. We are no different from anybody else on a fundamental level.. meaning the building blocks of what we are.... we are human, and we have all of the facets that every other human being has. What may be different is that we choose with each and every breath, to behave in a certain fashion, in a non-harming and morally upstanding way.

In Korea they have a proverb that translates, roughly, as; Garbage human beings become monks, garbage monks become Zen students, garbage Zen students become Buddha!

What this means is that only a person who self-examines, identifies a shortcoming, and is willing to put forth the effort to change will change and improve. We need problems so that we can learn whatever they offer to teach us in the very act of our solving them.

Thomas Merton, the famous Trappist monk, was once queried as to why he had become a monk. But the tone of the question was, "You think you are so special, you are putting yourself up on a high pedestal." Merton's response was "I became a monk because I am just exactly like everyone else."



What does it take to become a monk? It takes exactly what has brought all of us to practice: our minds have gotten stuck on a question or problem. Unable to find the answer in our minds, we have reached a dead end. That is why we become monks. That is why we practice.

This was the problem that the historical Buddha, Siddartha Gautama (Shakyamuni) faced, and which ultimately resulted in his awakening and enlightenment, and true of his axial age contemporaries around the civilized world. It was and remains a human problem.

The reality is that we do not become monks in order to run away from life... but to run towards it. Indeed, there are many different paths and methods for embracing life, and my way is but one, and most likely a somewhat peculiar method. My Dying Practice is merely an offshoot or augmentation of my monastic practice... but, I am finding that they compliment one another in numerous, previously unlooked for and unexpected ways.



One such way is what I would like to discuss here today.

We all live, breathe, wake up, go to work, seek some form of entertainment or leisure, and go through our lives either leaning towards things that make us happy or give us joy, and leaning away from or averting from those things that cause us discomfort or make us sad. Time passes, and either, we die, leaving behind a few wonderful memories and a lot of wasted time. Or, we run into a figurative wall, take stock of what we are, what we have become, or where we are headed... and we find it to be less than satisfactory. We realize that we are not living life according to our values. That we have no values. That we are living life according to some other person's expectations, or some other similar situation or circumstance that leaves us feeling cold, dissatisfied, or out of tune with our heart, mind, and spirit.

This causes us to suffer. When we suffer, we bring suffering into the lives of those with whom we interact. It is a vicious cycle of sadness, disappointment, regret, guilt, and anger.

So. What do we do with that? How can dying practice help? Does this mean that everyone should become a monk or a nun?

Firstly, it does not mean that everyone (or most people... or even a significant number of people) should become a monk or a nun. That is not a path for the vast majority of people, and for good reason. Those of us who do have such a vocation are very much aware of it, most likely would not choose to have it, and would not willingly inflict it on others. But, if it exists, it is there whether we welcome it or not. And so, we are pushed to answer whatever burning question that drives us. For the rest of you.. if there is no question, there cannot possibly be an answer, so... why would you choose to go through the difficulties and discomforts of monastic life when there is no valid personal reason for you do so?

Perhaps many of you might benefit, however, from some form of daily spiritual practice. Whatever that translates to in your particular case. Much time is spent each day caring for your hair, teeth, fingernails, skin, clothing, belongings, dwellings, etc. With this in mind, it is mystifying to me that so few people will take the time to care for their inner self with the same level of care and attention. It is not my place to tell others what they should or should not do, or how they should live their life. But, perhaps it may be my place to simply let them know that some other path may be available in the event that they might one day decide that it is needful, or may offer some comfort or direction in their lives.



Dying practice is a temporary practice, though it does not have to be. It is only one practice of countless others. Most such practices however share many things in common. After all, they all address human lives, human concerns, human problems... and they all help us to discover human answers for our human questions. In quite a few cases, they even help us to formulate the questions to begin with.

For those people who feel that life is missing something, or is simply not satisfying. And, also, for those people for whom life is missing nothing, and is greatly satisfying.. but who are prepared to deepen their life experience, a daily spiritual practice is an appropriate and wonderful thing to incorporate into one's life.

I don't think that any such practice will give you the answers to your questions... you are always the sole party to discover answers which are relevant to your own life. Only you can inject meaning and purpose into your life, and only you can find the appropriate answers to the questions that you hold.

What a spiritual practice will do, is to help you to refine your life experience, focus your energies, maintain a sense of balance, centeredness, serenity, and tranquility.

Why is serenity, calmness or tranquility important?

My answer is that silence and calm abiding are the underlying commonality that we all share... every conscious being has, as its legacy, a simple quiet awareness that underlies everything that comes afterward; all of the facets of our 'individual personality' that overlay who and what we really and truly are.



This calm, abiding, silent awareness is the root of consciousness... of the sense of self, and of the sense of a world that is 'out there' somewhere.

We all share this. It is what we are. And we are all precisely that.

When we reconnect with it, and bring it into our daily life, we find that whatever we are called upon to face, whatever confronts us, no matter what it may be, we will do it better with a calm, clear, agile, and tranquil mind than with a mind that is disjointed, filled with strife and upset, and distracted.

In order to find out what we are, we must re-discover the silence that is at our core. This is what a spiritual practice will offer. But, that is not all that it offers; Once we have rediscovered this calm, centered, tranquil, silent aspect of our inner self, we begin to look outward once again with a clear perception of truth and authenticity.

What does this mean? What is authenticity and why does it matter?

Well.. for many, life consists of running around each and every day doing whatever is necessary to amass more and more material wealth, regardless of the cost to themselves or to others. They buy the 'things', and they expect that happiness will somehow spring from this. Each day is filled with a yearning, a desire, a hunger for 'more, bigger, better, shinier, harder, NOW!!'

But how long can this go on, realistically? How much 'stuff' must one own before happiness sets in?


I cannot deny that some level of financial viability is necessary in our life in order for us to be happy... we are physical beings with physical needs. But, how much do we REALLY need?

What I have learned is that the huge open mouth of desire can NEVER be satisfied. It doesn't matter how much you pour into it... it will always want more. So.. what can we do?



This is where a daily spiritual practice and the concept of living an authentic life comes in. This is precisely the purpose of Dying Practice. This is precisely the purpose of a monastic vocation. And, most likely this is precisely the purpose (the original untainted purpose) of any religious practice, at least before human beings, filled with these self same desires, have turned and twisted religious practice to serve their own ends.

On a personal level, however, we all need harmony and balance. We all must find our place in the world, and learn to live with all of the other beings that share the world with us without killing and hurting one another. We all want to be happy, and we all want to avoid suffering. Even an insect will run away from something that is hurting it or threatening it. It is part of our nature to do so.

In order to get someplace. Anyplace. We must have three bits of knowledge. We must know, firstly, where we are. Secondly, we must know where it is, precisely, that we wish to go. Once we know these two things, we can begin to figure out how to get from one to the other.

A spiritual practice helps us to study and learn who and what we are. To discover our own inner truth. It may offer some guideline that may help us to discover where it is that we wish to be. And, in most cases, it helps us to figure out how to negotiate the world in order to get wherever it is that we are heading.



One of the greatest benefits of such a practice, Dying Practice included, is that we sharpen our perceptions, and we habitually seek out the truth; of whatever it is that we are confronting or engaging.

Falsehood, delusion, illusion, fantasy, lies, deceit, and other assorted facets of bullshit and fuckery are confusing to us in the best case, causing us to chase our tails, waste time, and become disoriented... and in the worst case, they result in wasted, unhappy, and perhaps harmful, toxic lives that bring only pain and suffering to the one whose life it is... and to everyone and everything with whom they come into contact.



These people end up being shunned and disliked by others, rather than loved... and it only gets worse.

The truth is that we all share the same sacred underpinnings of life, and silence, and consciousness... and only compassion, tolerance, and kindness can break through and access the true nature of the person that is hidden beneath all of the layers of pain, hurt, sadness, and other afflictive emotions that have built up as a result of living an inauthentic and delusive lifestyle.

So. I have rambled on about 'authenticity' and the living of 'an authentic life'. But, what does this mean? How can you possibly live an authentic life if you aren't sure what an authentic life is comprised of? And if you were to pose such a question, it would be a fair and appropriate one.

I will list ten facets of an authentic life below, but please be aware that this is in no way a complete or exhaustive all-encompassing and 'correct' answer. We each live our own life, we are all slightly different in our definition of purpose, happiness, and many other things... and so this is a highly personal and subjective thing. This list therefore only poses a guide. A fairly accurate guide... but, a guide nonetheless. Enjoy!



1. Discover a Purpose for your life. What is your path? We mostly inject meaning into our own lives, and it is very important that we do so! Are you wandering through life with little direction – hoping that you’ll find happiness, health and prosperity? Or, hoping that it will somehow find you?! Identify your life purpose or and you will have your own unique compass that will help to keep you moving in the proper direction even when it is difficult to discern.

2. Identify your values. What do you value most? Some examples are kindness, honesty, integrity, security, freedom, family, spiritual development, learning, etc. As you set goals for your life and your immediate future – check your goals against your values. If the goal doesn’t align with any of your values – you may want to reconsider it or revise it. Every breath offers a choice - Do you act within the boundaries of your values? Or do you violate them? What are you going to do? In order to answer this question, it is important to be cognizant of what, precisely, it is that you value, and what kind of person you wish to be.

3. Identify your needs. Unmet needs can keep you from living authentically. Grandiose or unrealistic perceptions of your needs cause suffering. It is important to find a 'Middle Way' between the extreme of self-denial, and self-indulgence. Take care of yourself. Do you have a need to be acknowledged, to be right, to be in control, to be loved? Honestly determine your needs and take action to see that you are able to meet them! Take care to identify only NEEDS.. as opposed to wants, wishes, hopes, or desires. They are not the same thing.

4. Know your passion. Honor those things that make your heart sing and your spirit fly. Bring your passion into the world in whatever form it takes. Arrange your life so that you will have the time and the ability to pursue this passion. Whatever it is, do more of it!

5. Live from the inside out. Increase your awareness of your inner wisdom by regularly reflecting and contemplating in silence. Commune with nature. Breathe deeply to quiet your distracted mind. Walk gently upon the earth, and plant kisses of peace and tranquility with each step, rather than stomping around in urgency and strife. Walk in harmony and beauty each moment of each day.. and remember that you carry the seeds of this harmony and beauty within you.

6. Honor your strength. What are your positive traits? What special talents do you have? Are you imaginative, witty, good with your hands? Find ways to express your authentic self through your strengths. Each of us has untapped strengh within us. It is a matter of choosing to find it and to put it into practice. You are the one with sole responsibility for your life, and for your well being. So, no matter *what* you do; stand up straight, on your own two feet, be courageous, give it all that you have got, every time, do the best that you can, never quit, and be a lamp unto yourself. Don't believe anything that you are told, or anything that you read until you have experienced it first hand, compared it to your own personal experience and wisdom, and have lived it FIRSTHAND. Don't ever be afraid to give. This is true strength.

7. Take time to play. Give yourself time to recharge doing things you love to do or by just doing nothing. When you breathe, you must both breathe in *and* breathe out. Study your breath... try to find the exact moment when the inbreath becomes the outbreath, and vice-versa... and realize that life is a never ending stream... it doesn't wait... it won't slow down for you. So, you must take the time for play... work it into your day. You are responsible for caring for yourself and for your own happiness and well being.

8. Be aware of your self-talk. Are you blocking your potential? Choose the kind of chatter that’s goes on in your mind. Become aware of the negative messages you give yourself. Gently catch them and turn them into positive affirmations. Thoughts will arise and they will fade... incessantly.... be mindful of your thoughts and responses. Thoughts are just thoughts... like bubbles... you cannot weigh one... you cannot touch one. Watch your mind, study it, learn how it works. When you discover thoughts that are self-defeating... gently set them down and turn your thoughts in more positive directions. Repeat as necessary!

9. Surround yourself with inspiration. Keep a journal. Create an altar or other sacred space where you live, work, or play. Place things that inspire you in this place. Make it a habit to visit this spot on a daily basis and reflect upon the things that these objects symbolize. Find ways to bring this inspiration into being in your life. Do something... even if it is small. No great thing is comprised of only a great thing... but of many small and seemingly inconsequential things. Allow your inspiration to direct you and to goad you into action!

10. Serve others. When you live authentically, you may find that you develop an interconnected sense of being. When you are true to who you are, living your purpose and giving of your talents to the world around you, you give back in service what you came to share with others. Never be afraid to give. In small ways, in big ways, in any way possible. If you have nothing to give materially, give of your attention and your time. Find some small thing that you *can* do... and just do it!

How long is your life? Can you stretch it? How much time do you have left? Can you afford to not live authentically? Can you?